Kaplan GRE & GMAT Exams Writing Workbook, 3rd Edition (2008)

Chapter 4. Writing Strong Paragraphs and Essays

Your goal is to write a 6-point essay. Our goal is to show you exactly how to do that. In this chapter, we’ll review the writing process and the steps you need to take to write an essay that earns a top score. We’ll also review the logic skills you need to effectively analyze and present arguments. Finally, we’ll show you the Kaplan Five-Step method for writing as well as versatile sample templates to use on test day.

PART ONE: THE WRITING PROCESS

You probably know by now that a good written product comes from a good writing process. Whether you tend to brainstorm and organize in your head or put everything down on paper, whether you like to write one draft or ten, your writing will come out stronger when you start with a plan, write out your ideas, and then revise and edit your work.

In most real-life writing situations, you have plenty of time to work through each of these writing stages. But, except for the GRE Issue essay, you have only 30 minutes each, so you should forget about the planning stage and jump right in, right? Emphatically, NO. Even though your time is limited, even if you tend to write well under pressure, you’re far more likely to earn a higher score if you work through each stage of the writing process (especially the planning stage). A few minutes of brainstorming can help you come up with powerful examples to support your assertions; a few minutes of revising and editing can help you catch and correct errors that would otherwise reduce your score. So here’s a review of the writing process as it specifically applies to writing a top-scoring essay for the GRE or GMAT.

Planning Your Essay

This first step in the writing process is also perhaps the most essential for a timed essay exam. Planning (also called prewriting) should take about 1/4 of your test time (save half for the actual writing, and another 1/4 for revising and editing). So for a 30-minute essay, spend about 7 minutes planning your essay before you begin to write.

Understanding the Writing Task

Before brainstorming, before outlining, before you do anything else, make sure you understand the writing task. Exactly what is it that you are being asked to do?

The Issue Stimulus. The Issue stimulus is intended to provoke. Most stimuli present two sharply contrasting points of view on an issue and invite you to take a stance. Some appear to present only one point of view, but in fact there is an implied alternative. Sometimes it will seem to you that the question is a no-brainer, that you simply must take one particular point of view. This is a mistake. The scoring protocol places a premium on a critical response to the stimulus itself. That is, you must choose a side, but you must also analyze your choice and how it compares to other alternatives. If you simply choose a side and launch into a recitation of supporting arguments, you will not get a top score.

For example, let’s look at the following Issue stimulus:

Some people think a college education should be available to every citizen. Others think that only the most talented students should be offered this opportunity. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Before you take a side, consider all of the possible positions. The stimulus only lays out two possibilities—that college education be available to everyone and that it only be available to the most talented students. Clearly there are other alternatives, not just theoretically but in reality. For example, some of our institutions are highly selective, while others are open to anyone who completes a high school education. Yet even the most selective universities espouse a policy of inclusiveness, with admissions policies that take into account a variety of non-academic factors. And even those public colleges with the most lenient admissions policies still have academic standards that effectively prevent the least talented students from obtaining a diploma.

Whatever side you choose (or whether you take a middle ground), to earn a top score, you must both take a position and show that you have carefully considered a whole range of possibilities, not just an automatic yes/no or either/or response. (This stimulus is an example of a false dilemma, covered in more detail later in this chapter.)

The Argument Stimulus. While the Issue essay gives you the opportunity to make an argument, the Argument essay is designed to see how well you can assess an argument. Although you may be tempted to offer your opinion on the topic or issue in the argument, don’t. Your job is not to argue your position but to analyze the argument on three levels:

1. expose its structure

2. highlight its weaknesses, including
a. the assumptions upon which the argument is based
b. poorly defined terms
c. logical fallacies

3. suggest ways to make it more logical and compelling For example, here’s a typical Argument stimulus about education:

The following appeared in a memo from an admissions officer at Brandywine University:

Experts agree that to an overwhelming extent, perceived job prospects determine undergraduates’ choice of field of study. Currently, the most popular major at Brandywine is computer technology, which must be due to the success of our recent graduates in finding good jobs. Clearly our recruitment efforts would be much more successful if we drew attention to our eminent professors in the field of computer technology, and publicized the successes of our recent graduates in landing high-paying jobs.

Your response to this stimulus should not discuss whether Brandywine should use a different recruitment strategy or why computer technology is such a popular major. Your task is to analyze the logic of this proposal. Is “perceived job prospects” indeed the key factor in determining a field of study? (Says who?) Is the popularity of computer technology most likely due to graduate job success rates, or are there other reasons? Is it therefore logical to draw attention to professors in that field and publicize the success of graduates to recruit new students? As you prepare to write, you need to consider these and other questions and look for the flaws in the argument—and there will be several. Knowing that analysis is your task, you can begin to brainstorm ideas for your response.

Brainstorm Ideas

Now that your task is clear, it’s time to start brainstorming ideas. Do you know what position you want to take from the get-go, or do you need to think about it? Think it through on paper.

Brainstorming Techniques.Brainstorming simply refers to the technique of focusing on a particular problem or issue to come up with ideas. For an essay, you can try listingmapping, or freewriting. Write down whatever comes to your mind about the topic. Remember that in a brainstorm, anything goes. Don’t discount any ideas yet—you’re still in the planning stage, and an idea that doesn’t seem relevant now can lead you to another that may form the crux of your argument. Forget about grammar, sentence structure, or anything else that might hinder your thoughts. Just get your ideas down on paper. If you don’t know where to start, try writing the main issue or question and answering it or addressing the first assertion in the Argument stimulus.

For the Issue stimulus, if you don’t know which position you will take, first brainstorm to determine your thesis. If you know as soon as you read the stimulus what position you would like to argue, then jump right into the second step: brainstorming support for your argument. It’s particularly important to brainstorm ideas for opposing points of view so you can address counterarguments in your essay.

Argument Stimulus Topics

Most of the Argument stimuli in ETS’s current published pool for the GRE and GMAT are mini-proposals based on two to four pieces of evidence. In 40 percent of the GRE Argument stimuli, the evidence includes results of a “recent study,” most often a survey. The topics can be roughly sorted out as follows (percentages are approximate):

Business: recommendations to improve profits, generally through of choice of products or services offered, absenteeism, and worker productivity (GRE: 30–35% of the pool; GMAT: 60%)

Health and Safety: findings and recommendations focusing on diet, nutrition, exercise, safety equipment (GRE: 20–25%; GMAT: 10%)

Community Planning: proposals to increase revenues and improve services, generally through modifications in land use, infrastructure, and utilities contracts (GRE: 19%; GMAT: 10%)

Education: recommendations to adjust course offering or other policies so as to improve revenues, recruit more students, create more job opportunities for graduates (GRE: 15%; GMAT: 10%)

Scholarly Research: findings in a variety of fields, but primarily archaeology and Earth history (GRE: 5%)

Ecology: findings and recommendations related to endangered species (GRE: 5%)

Public Policy: how to deal with crime, trade deficit, other national problems; improve services; political campaign strategies (GMAT: 10%) This list of topic categories is not comprehensive, and the categories are not mutually exclusive. Many health and safety stimuli as well as education stimuli, for instance, are essentially commercial in focus.

Below are examples of three brainstorming techniques for the sample Issue and Argument stimuli:

ISSUE: Some people think a college education should be available to every citizen. Others think that only the most talented students should be offered this opportunity. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

ARGUMENT: Experts agree that to an overwhelming extent, perceived job prospects determine undergraduates’ choice of field of study. Currently, the most popular major at Brandywine is computer technology, which must be due to the success of our recent graduates in finding good jobs. Clearly our recruitment efforts would be much more successful if we drew attention to our eminent professors in the field of computer technology, and publicized the successes of our recent graduates in landing high-paying jobs.

Listing means just that—simply list whatever ideas come to mind. In the sample list below, the author starts with a series of questions that leads him to more concrete ideas he can use as the base of his essay.

Is education a right or privilege? BOTH

Right: To what level?
Why cut off at high school? (Cost prohibitive?)

Privilege: Must be earned—but how?

Who earns that privilege?
Who decides who’s earned it?
What kind of talent? Not just academic, also dedication

Problem: how to define talent

*Democracy vs. meritocracy

More educated populace = good for EVERYONE

Less ignorance (thus more tolerance, better health care, etc.)
More skilled work force
Less poverty
More active in community and politics

Mapping takes a more spatial approach than the linear list. Use a map to lay out relationships between ideas as you brainstorm.

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Freewriting is exactly that—a free narrative response to develop ideas unencumbered by the conventions of essay writing (no worries about grammar, paragraphing, cohesion, etc.).

OK, perceived job prospects are important but my initial reaction is they put too much weight on this. Most people I know didn’t choose their major because of potential jobs but because they like the field, or if they did choose because of a specific job its because they think they’ll like that career, of course if there’s a high demand for a particular career that does make it more appealing, but for example I’d never switch from biology to computer technology simply because there’s a lot of highpaying jobs waiting for me upon graduation. I think comp tech is so popular because kids like computers, not just because those undergrads want good jobs. Another prob: doubt that it’s the most popular major because of the success of recent grads. That’s always a boost, because it’s evidents of a good program. But is that what recruiting should focus on? Yes, eminent profs and grad success rates are important but recruitment should also focus on solidity of program. And what about the other programs at B? What’s not said here is what % of students are comp tech majors and how that fits into the overall mission/departmts/programs at the school. (BTW who are those experts? Memo doesn’t say.)

Outlining Your Essay

Once you’ve brainstormed ideas, it’s time to put them—quickly—into a logical order. It might be tempting to just jump in and write, but resist that temptation. A good outline will make the actual writing of your essay much easier and help minimize revising needs.

The goal of an outline is two-fold: (1) to put the ideas you brainstormed into a logical order and (2) to help ensure that you have enough support for each of the assertions you plan to make in your essay. By laying everything out before you write, you can see if you have any gaps in support or logic in your argument. If so, you can fix those problems before it’s too late. You can also map out a logical sequence of ideas so that your argument or analysis flows smoothly from one paragraph to another.

A Well-Organized Outline = A Well-Organized Essay. You may tend to resist writing outlines for your normal writing tasks, but it’s too important a step to ignore on this exam. After all, brilliant analysis alone will not earn you a top score on your essay. ETS graders are looking for logical organization at every level of the essay, from the broad structure down to the individual sentence.

At the broadest level, the essay must have a beginning, a middle, and an end. The introductory paragraph must engage the stimulus, state the thesis, and lay out the plan for the body of the essay. The body of the essay must present two to four well-developed points in support of the claim staked out in the introduction. The conclusion should summarize the essay as a whole.

Too often, though, this three-part structure becomes something of a “list sandwich”: the introduction and conclusion are just there to hold an undifferentiated list of points. As a result, the reader has no idea where the argument is going, and feels jerked along, rather than feeling like a paying customer on a guided tour. While it is not necessary to declare explicitly the rationale behind your organization, you should definitely lay out your points in a clear trajectory. That is, your supporting ideas must be arranged in some logical sequence, even if there is no logical necessity to that sequence. Here are some of the possibilities:

Bullet If your points respond to a series of fallacies in an argument, you might organize them in the same sequence as they appear in the stimulus.

Bullet You might follow the structure of a logical argument and organize your points according to the parts of an argument: problems with premises, problems with assumptions, and (therefore) problems with the conclusion.

Bullet You might deploy your arguments in order of importance, or in order of accessibility or complexity (most obvious to most subtle, least complicated to most intricate).

Or you can let the subject matter be your guide and arrange your points by

Bullet chronology

Bullet cause and effect

Bulletcomparison and contrast

Bullet analysis or classification

Bullet problem-solution

Bullet scale

Scale can be perceived along many gradients. Here are just a few examples:

Bullet local, regional, national, global

Bullet individual, family, neighborhood, community, society

Bullet microscopic, organic, systemic

Bullet employee, department, division, corporation

Once you’ve determined your overall organizing principle, outline your major supporting points and the specific evidence and examples you can use to support each of those main points. Here’s an example:

1. Intro: College education is a right, not just a privilege. It should be available to every citizen, and those with talent should be offered extra opportunities.

2. Why it’s a right: democracy not meritocracy

a. Country founded on democratic principle, all created equal, equal opportunity
i. Principle used throughout primary and secondary schooling
ii. Used in work force, government, law enforcement
iii. Why not higher ed?
iv. Counterargument: high school should be enough to satisfy equality for all principle

1. rebuttal: lack of college education limits a whole segment of population, keeps them at lower wages, lower socio-economic status (transition to next para)

3. Why meritocracy is a problem

a. Few in control of many (who decides who can go to college?)
b. How do you define “talented”?
c. Ripe for corruption

4. Benefits of equal opportunity

a. Less ignorance (thus more tolerance, better health care, less drugs/violence, etc.)
b. More skilled workforce
c. Less poverty
d. More involvement in community and politics

5. Conclusion (restate thesis)

A Well-Developed Outline = A Well-Developed Essay. Why is development an issue in the outlining stage? Because your outline can show you which paragraphs need more support. Now’s the time to review your outline for completeness. Do you have enough ideas and information to cover each topic thoroughly? Do you cover everything you need to cover, including counterarguments (in the Issue essay) and suggested improvements for the proposal (in the Argument essay)? For example, in the previous outline, the author does not address counterarguments in paragraphs 3 and 4, and paragraph 3 in general could use more development/support.

Writing Your Essay

Now that you have a detailed outline, the actual writing of your essay should go rather smoothly. You know what you want to say and the order in which you want to say it.

Introductions: Get Off to a Strong Start

In regular academic writing, your essay introductions typically have two main goals: (1) to grab the reader’s attention and (2) to clearly state your thesis. On the Analytical Writing tasks, however, your focus should emphatically be on the latter. Right from the start, readers (both human and computer) need to know the main idea of your essay.

What about grabbing the reader’s attention with a catchy introduction? A real attention-grabber might impress your human reader, but it won’t make a whit of difference to the E-rater. In fact, depending upon your approach, the E-rater may interpret such an introduction as a bit off topic. Our advice: if you can immediately think of a catchy introduction with a highlyrelevant word base (the E-rater is programmed to look for a list of topic-related words), then by all means, use it. However, you don’t have time to waste thinking of a good attention-grabber, so if it doesn’t come to you right away, stick to a standard introduction.

Template for a Standard Introduction

1. Begin by briefly paraphrasing the issue or summarizing the argument.

2. State your thesis.

3. Outline the main points to be covered in your essay (in the order in which you will cover them).

Example:

Is higher education something that should be available just to the most talented students, or should it be available to everyone? I firmly believe the latter. Limiting access to higher education to a small percentage of our population undermines our democracy and hurts our society on many levels—socially, economically, and even morally. It also creates a host of problems in selecting those who are “most talented.” Academic talent does deserve to be rewarded—but not at the expense of everyone else.

Now here’s the same introduction with a catchy sentence added to the beginning to grab the reader’s attention:

If, as the Declaration of Independence states, our country is founded on the belief that “all men are created equal,” then why should only the most talented students be allowed the chance to attend college? This opportunity should be available to all citizens, not just the academic elite. Limiting access to higher education to a small percentage of our population undermines our democracy and hurts our society on many levels—socially, economically, and even morally. It also creates a host of problems in selecting those who are “most talented.” Academic talent does deserve to be rewarded—but not at the expense of everyone else.

Writing a Strong Thesis Statement. Before we go any further, it’s time to review the definition of a thesis statement. First, here’s what a thesis statement is not:

Bullet A thesis statement is not a question: Is higher education a right or a privilege?

Bullet A thesis statement is not a paraphrase of the stimulus: Some argue that highereducation is a right; others that it is a privilege.

Bullet A thesis statement is not a general statement about the topic: There is muchdebate about whether higher education is a right or a privilege.

Bullet A thesis statement is not a general statement about how other people feel about the topic: Many people believe that higher education is a right, not just aprivilege.

Now here’s what a thesis statement is:

A sentence that makes an assertion about the topic and clearly expresses the main idea of the essay: Access to higher education is a right, not a privilege.

For your essay, a good thesis statement:

Bullet Issue essay: Clearly states your position on the issue (what you think and why you think it).

Bullet Argument essay: Clearly states the main flaws in the argument (summarizes what’s wrong with the stimulus).

Writing Strong Paragraphs

A paragraph by definition is a group of sentences about a single idea. Make sure your paragraphs have clear topic sentences stating that main idea of each paragraph. In your regular writing you may be more subtle, but for the Analytical Writing task—given your readers (a tired human and a computer program) you want to be as clear and obvious as possible.

Developing Ideas. There’s no magic number for how many sentences should be in a paragraph, because this depends upon the length of sentences and the purpose of the paragraph. For example, there are times when a short, one-sentence paragraph is rhetorically effective. But the Analytical Writing task is no such place, because the E-rater is likely to consider your rhetorical technique an underdeveloped paragraph. Likewise, there are times when a seven or eight sentence paragraph is appropriate—but not on the Analytical Writing task.

To play it safe on the exam, aim for 4–5 sentence paragraphs throughout your essay. In general, that’s about what it takes, given average sentence lengths, to fully develop an idea: one topic sentence, two or three sentences with specific examples or evidence, and a sentence or two acknowledging and refuting counterarguments or providing a transition into the next paragraph.

The only exception to this guideline for paragraph length might be the conclusion, which is likely to be more concise than other paragraphs because there isn’t a new idea to develop.

Organizing Ideas. You’ve already decided upon your overall principle of organization in your outline. But ETS graders will be looking not just for macro-organization (overall organizing principle of the essay), but also for meso- (intermediate, paragraph level) and micro- (sentence level) organization as well. At the meso-scale, there are three issues:

1. Paragraph unity. Does each paragraph deal with a single coherent idea? Do any extraneous ideas creep in to distract the reader’s attention? The E-rater cannot directly evaluate content, but it does analyze the vocabulary used in each paragraph in order to assess the likelihood that a single point is presented and developed, without extraneous ideas. (And your human reader will catch an off-topic sentence no matter how quickly he or she reads through your essay.)

2. Topic sentences. Does each paragraph have one main idea clearly stated in a topic sentence? We all know that the topic sentence can occur anywhere in the paragraph. Perfectly good paragraphs may even lack a topic sentence. But on the exam, play it safe. If at all possible, deploy a fully-developed topic sentence at the opening of each paragraph.

3. Transitional phrases. Are there smooth and effective transitions between and within paragraphs? Your entire essay should be stitched together with transitional phrases. From the second paragraph to the conclusion, each topic sentence should begin with a conspicuous signpost marking the trajectory of your argument: the first prob-lem,first of all, second, furthermore, one additional factor, in conclusion, etc. Within each paragraph, use signals that will draw the reader’s attention to what you are doing: such as, for example, an alternative explanation, on the one hand/on theother, by contrast, however, nonetheless, consequently, therefore, and so on.

Here’s a more complete list of some of the most useful transitional words and phrases for your essays:

Purpose

Transitions

Show addition

and, also, again, in addition, furthermore, moreover,

 

besides, next, too

Introduce an example

for example, for instance, such as, in particular

 

in fact, in other words, that is, specifically, on the one hand/other, to illustrate

Indicate the passage of time

before, after, afterward, next, during,

 

meanwhile, later, eventually, in the meantime, immediately, suddenly, finally

Indicate rank

first, second, third, etc. (of all); first and foremost; most

 

important; more importantly; above all

Indicate cause

because, since, for this reason

Indicate effect

as a result, consequently, therefore, hence

Indicate comparison

similarly, likewise, like, just as, in the same manner

Indicate contrast

but, however, on the other hand, on the contrary, conversely,in

 

contrast, yet, whereas, instead, rather, while, although, though,despite

Add emphasis

in fact, indeed, certainly, above all

Summarize or conclude

in sum, in summary, in short, in conclusion, to

 

conclude, to sum up, that is, therefore

Development and Organization

A well-developed essay:

Bullet has at least four full paragraphs. Five or six are even better.

Bullet has at least three sentences in each paragraph, with the possible exception of a concise conclusion. Four to six sentences are even better.

Bullet provides specific examples, details, or evidence for the main idea of each paragraph.

A well-organized essay:

Bullet has an overall organizing principle for the essay.

Bullet has an organizing principle for each paragraph.

Bullet has only one main idea per paragraph.

Bullet clearly states the main idea of each paragraph.

Bullet has strong transitions between sentences and between paragraphs.

Wrapping It All Up: Writing Your Conclusion

Think for a moment about the last movie you saw. What’s the first scene that comes to mind? Chances are you best remember the beginning or the end of the film. For better or for worse, first and final impressions do count, and this is especially true in writing. Indeed, conclusions often have the power to make or break an essay. A weary human reader, for example, might be well satisfied throughout your essay only to be disappointed by a weak conclusion, turning your 6 into a 5—or worse.

As we’ve said many times now, your best bet is to play it safe throughout your essay, and this includes the conclusion. You want your ending to have impact, but you don’t have the time or the rhetorical freedom to do anything fancy with your conclusion. (Remember, the E-rater won’t pick up on any sophisticated rhetorical techniques.) Instead, stick to a standard conclusion that:

1. restates your main idea and

2. briefly summarizes your main support. In the Argument essay, you should also:

3. point out ways in which the argument could be improved and/or what additional information you need to more accurately assess the argument (unless you have addressed these issues in a separate, fully-developed paragraph).

Your conclusion should not:

Bullet Repeat the thesis statement in exactly the same words. Your essay is too short for direct repetition. When you restate your main idea, make sure it’s an effective paraphrase.

Bullet Open a new can of worms. A good conclusion will always provide a sense of closure for readers so that they feel as if the topic has been covered completely. If you introduce a new topic, readers will feel cheated because your essay is over and you have no place to develop this new idea.

Revising and Editing Your Essay

The difference between revising and editing is simple: revising refers to any changes you make above and beyond the level of grammar and usage, mechanics, or formatting, as these fall within the realm of editing. Typically writers are advised to revise first, as revision addresses big-picture issues such as organization and development and sentence-level issues such as structure and word choice. But your time on the Analytical Writing tasks is limited, and if you used your time effectively, you will only have about 7 or 8 minutes left to review your essay. So you will have to revise and edit simultaneously.

Big Picture Checklist

As you revise, check for the following “big picture” issues. Your essay should:

Bullet State ideas assertively and clearly. Do you have a clear thesis statement at the beginning of your essay? Do you have clear topic sentences in each paragraph?

Bullet Develop ideas fully. Do you explain your ideas clearly and completely? Do you provide strong and specific support for your assertions?

Bullet Organize ideas logically. Do you have an effective organizing principle for your essay? Within your paragraphs? Have you paragraphed effectively?

Bullet Stay focused. Does your essay stick to one main idea? Is all of your support relevant? Are your paragraphs free from any sentences that digress off-topic?

Bullet Signpost constantly. Do you use strong transitions within and between paragraphs?

Sentence-Level Checklist

On the sentence level, check for the Eight Maxims of Effective Writing:

Bullet Are your sentences correct? Can you find and correct any errors in grammar or mechanics?

Bullet Are your sentences clear? Are there any ambiguous or vague sentences because of poor sentence structure or word choice?

Bullet Are your sentences concise? Can you eliminate any unnecessary repetition or wordiness?

Bullet Are your sentences exact? Have you used exact words and phrases as well as specific details?

Bullet Are your sentences assertive? Do you state your points without hesitation?

Bullet Are your sentences appropriate? Do you use the right level of formality throughout your essay?

Bullet Are your sentences consistent? Do you maintain an appropriate style, tone, and point of view throughout your essay?

Bullet Are your sentences exciting? Do you have variety in sentence structure and vocabulary?

Practice 1

Directions: Each of the following is a paragraph similar to those that might appear in a typical GRE or GMAT essay. Each paragraph includes numerous errors. Practice proofreading by locating and correcting all the errors in each paragraph. Compare your answers to the answers found on pages 153–156.

Paragraph 1

(1) The advise given to the company managers that hiring more additional workers will result in a larger number of houses being built contain a fallacy of exclusion. (2) Several pieces of extremely vital information are not taken into consideration in the reasoning that more workers means more houses built, a moments reasoning reveals that many factors other then merely the number of workers determines the answer to the question of how many houses will be built? (3) For example, if the construction company doesn’t have enough construction equipment/tools to equip more worker’s, then extra workers won’t help irregardless. (4) If there aren’t enough building sights available, a raw materials shortage, or sufficient infrastructure to support additional workers, then hiring more workers might well been just a waste of money. (5) The whole question of diminishing returns is not considered by this line of reasoning at all in increasing staff size.

Paragraph 2

(1) While the School Boards argument that eating breakfast is related to a reduction of absenteeism in the school breakfast program may be convincing. (2) The conclusion that forcing more students to eat breakfast on the school program will cause a decreasing drop in absences is unwarranted. (3) The statistic’s show a correspondance that is far from clear enough to assume causation. (4) The attendance of students at the school-sponsored breakfast program and at subsequent classes maybe both result from a third, unexamined cause that creates the observed affect. (5) For example, students who eat school breakfasts everyday might just happen to be the ones who go to bed early, and therefore are up in time for both the breakfast and for classes. (6) Or maybe the students with better attendance experience a different kind of parent supervision that contributes to both one’s better diet and their improved attendance.

Paragraph 3

(1) In surveying their customers and found that they prefer games with lifelike graphics, the computer game company has correctly identified a cause for an increase in the popularity of particular game types. (2) From the evidence presented it seems okay to think that certain customers might maybe buy the more lifelike games in preference to games with worse graphics. (3) However, the conclusion that game sales will rise as an end result of this action neglects to take into account the evidence. (4) That the more lifelike games require the latest new computer hardware. (5) The argument presents no evidence to show the fact that the target audience is undergoing a transition to this more advanced and more expensive type of computer platform. On the contrary common sense seems perhaps to suggest that, since the target audience tends to be young, that their earning power would not allow them to acquire the equipment necessary to accomodate the games in question, and thus it would not necessarily result in increased sales of those games. (7) If the company was to invest in developement of these games, they might waste money in the end.

PART TWO: A BRIEF LOGIC PRIMER

Logic is a key factor in the scoring of both the Issue and Argument essays. ETS graders are, of course, looking for logical organization in your essays. Equally important, they are looking for logic in your analysis of the essay stimulus. This requirement is clearer in an Argument task, since you are specifically asked to critique a line of thinking. The Issue task, on the other hand, seems to be rather straightforward: you are told to take a stance on the given issue and support that position. In actuality, however, you are expected to engage the issue, to consider the complexities not only of the general idea behind the prompt but also of the specific wording of the prompt itself. That confrontation must be founded on logic, and it must be presented as part of the essay.

The study of logic is a field in itself, one that is central to philosophy, mathematics, and other fields. You are not expected to have any formal training in logic or in any other field that is covered in the Argument stimuli. However, a primer in some of the basics of critical thinking, including the basic structure of arguments and common logical fallacies, will give you an edge in analyzing your Argument stimulus and writing an effective essay.

Logic Terms

Claim: an assertion that is either true or false

Argument: a set of claims with a premise(s) and conclusion

Conclusion: the main claim of the argument

Premise: claims that support the conclusion

Basic Argument Structure

First, some terms. In logic, an argument is not a quarrel, dispute, or verbal disagreement. Rather, it is a persuasive appeal involving two or more statements, including a conclusion and at least one premise (evidence to support that conclusion). A conclusion is the main claim of the argument. The conclusion of an argument may take the form of a declarative statement, but it may also be embedded in a proposal, recommendation, plan, or prediction. It is only a conclusion as part of an argument; without the premise(s) to support it, it is simply an assertion or claim that lacks support. That’s essentially what differentiates Issue stimuli from Argument stimuli—the former are assertions while the latter are arguments (however problematic).

Premises and Conclusions

In approaching an Argument stimulus, your first task will be to identify the conclusion and the premises. The conclusion is not necessarily the last point presented. It could just as well appear in the guise of a topic sentence, at the beginning of a passage, or in the middle of the passage, after a sentence or two of background exposition.

Common indicators of the conclusion include:

therefore

this proves/shows/suggests/implies that

so

we can infer that

hence

which implies that

thus

should

accordingly

must

consequently

may be inferred from

it follows that

 

Common verbal indicators of a premise include:

because

since

in as much as

given that

for the following reasons

in view of the fact that

In the recruitment memo Argument stimulus, the conclusion is marked by the less obvious indicator clearly. But many other conclusion indicators could easily be inserted before the final sentence:

[Premise] Experts agree that to an overwhelming extent, perceived job prospects determine undergraduates’ choice of field of study. [Premise] Currently, the most popular major at Brandywine is computer technology, which must be due to the success of our recent graduates in finding good jobs. [Conclusion] This proves that/Thereofre/Accordingly/It follows that/Clearly our recruitment efforts would be much more successful if we drew attention to our eminent professors in the field of computer technology, and publicized the successes of our recent graduates in landing high-paying jobs.

All claims have a truth value; they are either true or false. In a valid argument, the conclusion must be true if all of the premises are true. But no Argument stimuli are valid. They are all rather weak invalid arguments in which the conclusion is not necessarily true even if the premises are all true. In most cases, one or more of the premises will be false, so even if the conclusion is true, the argument will still be unsound because it is based on one or more false premises.

On the other hand, it is important to bear in mind that even though an argument is defective, the conclusion may still be true; it is simply the argument that is invalid.

Similarly, the fact that a conclusion is clearly true does not mean that the argument is strong or cogent because the premises may be problematic.

Logical Fallacies

Your task on the essay is to show the weaknesses in the Argument stimulus and to critically engage the Issue stimulus. Often there are leaps in logic, erroneous assumptions, and vague or otherwise problematic terms. Common sense alone will often be enough to identify these faults, but many arguments and issues also rely on a number of logical fallacies with which you may not be so familiar. Thus, we provide a brief review of the most common of those fallacies.

False Dilemma

False dilemma is one of the fundamental fallacies in logic. A familiar example of this fallacy is “America: love it or leave it.” This statement assumes that there are only two options: love America or leave it—and we must choose only between these two courses of action. Obviously, there are other options: we might love some things about America, but not everything; we might not love it, but choose to stay anyway; and so on. Hence the false dilemma, because there are more than two options from which to choose.

These are very common in Issue stimuli such as the following:

1. The key to success is not competition but cooperation.

2. The goal of an educational system must be to instill values, not to provide vocational training.

The first presents a false choice between competition and cooperation, when in fact competition and cooperation are not mutually exclusive and there are many other possible keys to success. The second presents a false choice between the goal of instilling values and providing training. But educational systems have many goals; instilling values and providing job training are both important. A good response might discuss some of the other goals and how to balance those with instilling values and job training.

Practice 2

Each of the following presents a false dilemma. Prove that the dilemma is false by listing alternatives in the space provided. Answers are found on page 156.

1. The key to success is not competition but cooperation.

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2. The goal of an educational system must be to instill values, not to provide vocational training.

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3. Government needs to provide social services instead of wasting money on the arts.

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4. If you’re not going to work hard at your job, you should quit.

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5. Anybody who supported that bill in the Senate either didn’t understand the issue or was trying to ruin America.

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6. The challenger is so unskilled in chess that the champion will either lose the game and be humiliated, or win and feel really guilty.

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Overstated Generalization

Another common Issue stimulus format is the overstated generalization, which can also make its way in to the Argument stimulus. Often such propositions make a broad statement about a specific group or institution:

Professional athletes must take their responsibility as role models more seriously.
Government cannot support the arts without undermining them.
It is not the place of schools to provide health education.

Other signs of the overstated generalization are superlatives (the most important), and extreme adverbs (never, always, rarely, onlyeverything, nothing, impossible, and of course extremely):

The chief lesson of history is that we have nothing to learn from it.
Progress arises only out of disagreement and discontent.

In terms of both form and content, these stimuli are frequently aphoristic: like proverbs, they are rhetorically balanced, morally instructive, and somewhat paradoxical. Here’s a perfect example:

Success is easy to achieve but difficult to enjoy.

Statements like this often sound sound. But the problem is that they make assumptions about the whole when there is at least one possible exception to the statement. For example, don’t some people enjoy their success? Don’t some people (in fact, probably many) have a difficult time achieving success? In reality, these overstated generalizations are much like false dilemmas—they assume only X is true and don’t consider alternatives. False dilemmas present you with two choices; you have to think of the in-betweens. Overstated generalizations state one point of view; again, you have to think of the alternatives.

Some stimuli may also present false dilemmas embedded within overstated generalizations:

An individual’s attitudes are primarily determined by his or her character rather than by the particular situation in which they are evoked.

Practice 3

Each of the following presents an overstated generalization. Prove that the generalization is overstated by listing exceptions in the space provided. Answers are found on page 157.

1. Government should never seek to restrict the rights of individuals.

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2. In business, the most important secret to success is originality.

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3. In leadership, no skill is so rare and yet so vital as the ability to make decisions.

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4. Any person who thinks schoolteachers have an easy job wouldn’t last a day in most public schools.

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5. The main goal of research should be practical technology that makes life more enjoyable for people in general.

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6. In today’s society, everyone thinks that style is more important than substance.

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Appeal to Authority

In making an argument, it is frequently legitimate to invoke the views of authorities. The argument might be strong if the authorities have pertinent expertise and credibility. The argument will be less strong if it cites “experts” without establishing their credentials or if there is substantial disagreement among experts as to the point in question. An argument based on anonymous authority (like one based on hearsay) is extremely weak, since the expertise of the authority cannot be verified.

For example, the sample argument on page 87 begins with an appeal to authority:

Experts agree that to an overwhelming extent…

Who are these experts? A serious flaw in this argument is that it doesn’t provide credentials for these authorities. The evidence attributed to anonymous experts may seem unobjectionable, but the appeal to authority is itself a weakness in the argument and should be cited in your critique of the stimulus.

Inductive Fallacies

All of the Argument stimuli will be inductive arguments, which means the conclusion is drawn from the evidence that is presented (the premises). Inductive reasoning frequently involves drawing inferences about a population as a whole based on information about a sample. Inductive fallacies arise from inappropriate reliance on a sample. That is, the conclusion is drawn from a sample that is too small (hasty generalization), unrepresentative of the target population (unrepresentative sample), or not analogous to the target population (false analogy).

Practice 4

The following is an example of inductive reasoning. Identify the conclusion and premises. Is the conclusion valid? Is it true? Answers are found on page 157.

The following appeared in a memo from a member of the school board in the town of Delos.

“For the past five years, Mr. Evan Brockhoff has been the head football coach at Central High School. During that time the varsity football team from Central High has won three state championships. In addition, the quality of the gymnasium and the athletic equipment at Central High has improved significantly over the past five years. Because of the outstanding achievements of Central High, the Delos school board should hire Mr. Brockoff as the general director in charge of athletic programs for the entire Delos school system.”

Conclusion:

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Premises:

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Hasty Generalization. A hasty generalization occurs when the size of the sample is too small to serve as a basis for the conclusion. We make hasty generalizations all the time. Eat at a restaurant once, for example, and say the food is lousy—hasty generalization. Eat at it two or three times, trying different dishes each time, and you have a better sample upon which to make your judgment.

GMAT hasty generalizations are apt to look like the following stimulus:

Surveillance cameras installed in two of the town’s ten municipal parking lots show that the lots are overcrowded, particularly between 8:30–10:00, 11:30–1:00, and 4:00–5:30. Overcrowded lots during these periods create hazards to drivers and pedestrians and increase congestion in nearby streets. Therefore, to alleviate congestion and improve safety, the township needs to build a new, multi-level municipal parking garage.

Common sense should tell you that two out of ten is not a large enough sample to come to the conclusion about all the parking lots in this argument. These two lots may be busier than the other eight—we don’t know—and we can’t rely on the information from this small a sample.

Unrepresentative Sample. An unrepresentative sample is one that differs in significant ways from the population as a whole. For example, if a study of sleep disorders is conducted on teenagers, but the results are projected on the entire population (including children and the elderly), the argument is invalid because the conclusions is based on an unrepresentative sample. Teenagers are a specific group within the population with specific characteristics that are not shared by other segments of the population. Likewise, the two parking lots in the hasty generalization sample stimulus might not be representative of the parking lots as a group. They may be much busier, or significantly smaller, or differ in other important ways from the other eight lots.

Practice 5

In what way is the sample in this stimulus unrepresentative of the population about which the claim is made? Answers are found on page 158.

Typically, as people age, the fatty deposits in their blood vessels (atherosclerosis) increase in size and number, making people more vulnerable to blood clots and blockages. A recent study concludes an effective way to reduce the risk of blockages in later life is to take aspirin daily. The four-year study followed a group of Belgian women in their eighties who were residents of assisted care facilities. The women were given daily dosages of aspirin. In addition, the women participated in an aquatic aerobics program. After three years, these women showed a much lower rate of atherosclerosis than is average for their age.

Ways the sample is unrepresentative:

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False Analogy. In making an analogy, one first establishes that two entities, processes, or situations are similar; then one infers that since the first term of comparison has a certain property, that property must also occur in the second term. A false analogy (comparing apples to oranges) occurs when the two terms of comparison differ in such a way as to invalidate the inferred commonality.

For example:

Our mall franchise has 30% less seating than our downtown franchise, yet it produces nearly twice the daily revenue. The lack of seating often creates a crowded condition in the store. This gives passersby the impression that our products are highly desirable. If we want to increase in our downtown franchise, we should cut back on seating.

There are many problems with the logic in this argument, but the most fundamental is that the two franchises are not directly comparable because of their locations. Mall traffic is likely to be heavier and steadier than a typical downtown location.

Practice 6

Identify the analogy and explain its weakness. Answers are found on page 158.

When Stuckley’s Family Buffet first opened, it was the largest, most heavily attended restaurant in town. It is still the largest restaurant, but it is no longer heavily used. A tally of table receipts last month revealed the restaurant’s drop in popularity: the receipts showed an average of only 50 parties of diners per day. In contrast, tiny Javamunch Cafe in the heart of the business district is visited by more than 150 people on a typical weekday. An obvious difference is that Javamunch Café, unlike Stuckley’s Buffet, provides full table service instead of buffet-style dining. Thus, if Stuckley’s is ever to be as popular as Javamunch, the management will obviously need to provide full table service, thereby providing what customers want.

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Causal Fallacies

Many Argument stimuli include causal arguments. Here are two key causal fallacies likely to appear.

Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc

The easiest causal fallacy to identify is probably post hocergo propter hoc (“after this, therefore because of this”). The fallacious assumption is that because X came before Y, it caused Y. However, there are three other important possibilities:

X and Y might have independent causes
X and Y might have the same cause
X might have been only one of several causes.

Here’s an example:

Our mall franchise put a new coat of paint on the walls, purchased potted plants, and put fresh flowers on the tables to coincide with the launch of our new value menu. In the first week of the new menu, its sales were 20% higher than all other franchises, and on many customer satisfaction surveys, clients specifically mentioned the new décor. To increase business at our other franchises, we should similarly upgrade the décor.

Of course, the improved décor came before the launch of the new menu, but it’s not likely the décor alone is responsible for the significantly higher percentage of sales. It certainly may be a factor, but there are too many other possible factors, including the knowns—the new value menu and the high-traffic location—and possible unknowns, such as advertising.

Indeed, in any causal argument, it’s important to consider whether X caused Y, or whether W caused both X and Y, or whether X and Y were both caused by independent factors, including the possibility of multiple causes.

Practice 7

Identify the weakness in the causal argument embedded in this stimulus. Answers are found on page 158.

The following appeared in a newspaper article published in the country of Saludia:

“Ten years ago, one half of all citizens in Saludia met the standards for healthy height-to-weight ratios as then defined by the ministry of health and fitness. Today, the ministry says that only one quarter of all citizens meet the standards and suggests that the increasing prevalence of office jobs may be the reason. But since healthy height-to-weight levels are highest in regions of Saludia where levels of office employment are also highest, it is clear that working in offices has not made citizens less physically fit. Instead, as shown by this year’s unusually low expenditures on fitness-related products and services, the recent decline in the economy is most likely the cause, and healthy weight levels will improve when the economy does.”

Weaknesses:

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Genuine but Insignificant Cause. Finally, there’s the causal fallacy of putting too much weight on a real but insignificant cause. In such an argument, a cause is correctly identified as such, but the argument neglects other pertinent and much more significant causes. Again, the mall franchise stimulus provides a good example. Sure, the new décor may have helped, but it is a far less significant factor than the new value menu. Other more significant causes could include advertising and the business’s location.

Suppressed Information

The fallacy of exclusion applies when there is a violation of the “principle of total evidence”: a valid argument must consider all relevant information. This fallacy applies to the majority of Argument stimuli. In many cases, a precedent or supposedly analogous case is introduced as evidence, but we cannot evaluate its relevance without pertinent data. The trick is to determine if essential information is missing or whether conclusions were drawn based on only part of the story.

The surveillance camera stimulus is a good example of the fallacy of exclusion. We cannot legitimately accept or reject the conclusion without knowing how representative the two parking lots are of the other eight. We also need more information on the impact such a project would have on the community as well as how such a project would be funded.

Slippery Slope

This fallacy is aptly named, because it’s easy to fall into the slippery trap set by the if/then scenario it presents. The slippery slope argues that if X happens, then Y will definitely follow. In some cases, there is a logical and definite causal relationship. But when X doesn’t necessarily lead to Y, then you have slippery slope reasoning, as in the following example:

Many companies these days have “casual Fridays” when employees have the opportunity to “dress down” and come to work in polos and slacks rather than suits and ties. But casual dress leads to a casual work ethic. People feel more professional when they are dressed professionally; thus they will feel less professional when they dress casually. In addition, one day of casual attire will affect professionalism throughout the week, and employees will attempt to wear more casual attire Monday through Thursday as well. Therefore, if we implement casual Fridays, we can expect to have a less productive and less professional workforce.

There are two slippery slopes in this argument: that casual Fridays will reduce professionalism throughout the week and that casual Fridays will result in a “less productive and less professional workforce.” There may indeed be a relationship between attire and professionalism, but not necessarily of the sort predicted here. In fact, casual clothes might help people feel more relaxed and comfortable at work, which may in turn boost productivity (not to mention employee satisfaction).

To summarize: We have reviewed the basic logical concepts as well as several specific types of fallacies that regularly appear in the stimuli. Familiarize yourself with these logical tools. They will equip you to quickly dismantle the reasoning behind the essay stimuli, saving you those precious minutes that can make the difference between a powerful, well-written essay and one that is merely acceptable.

PART THREE: THE KAPLAN FIVE-STEP METHOD FOR GRE AND GMAT ANALYTICAL WRITING

As you know, you have a limited amount of time to show the graduate school admissions people that you can think logically and express yourself in clearly written English. They don’t care how many syllables you can cram into a sentence or how fancy your phrases are. They care that you’re making sense. Whatever you do, don’t try to hide beneath a lot of hefty words and abstractions. Just make sure that everything you say is clearly written and relevant to the topic. Get in there, state your main points, back them up, and get out. Here’s our five-step plan to do just that.

1. Take the Issue/Argument Apart

Bullet Identify the topic (the broad subject), the scope (the specific aspect of the topic you’ll be dealing with), and the conclusion (the main idea the author wanted to establish in the prompt).

Bullet Locate the evidence used to support the conclusion.

Bullet Look for assumptions (pieces of evidence that are not explicitly stated, but that must be true in order for the argument to be valid).

Bullet Note any terms that are ambiguous and need defining.

2. Select the Points You Will Make

Bullet In the Issue essay, think of the arguments for both sides and make a decision as to which side you will support or the exact extent to which you agree with the stated position.

Bullet In the Argument essay, identify all the important gaps between the evidence and the conclusion. Think of remedies for the problems you discovered when taking apart the argument.

3. Organize Your Thoughts

Bullet Outline what you want to say in the introduction, in the middle paragraphs (one main idea per paragraph), and in your final paragraph.

Bullet Lead with your best arguments.

Bullet Think about how the essay as a whole will flow.

4. Write Your Essay

Bullet Start out and conclude with strong statements.

Bullet Be assertive.

Bullet Make transitions, link related ideas; it will help your writing flow.

5. Proofread

Bullet Save enough time to read through the entire essay.

Bullet Have a sense of the errors you are liable to make.

APPLYING THE KAPLAN FIVE-STEP METHOD TO THE ISSUE ESSAY

Let’s use the Kaplan Five-Step method on this sample Issue prompt:

The drawbacks to the use of nuclear power mean that it is not a long-term solution to the problem of meeting ever-increasing energy needs.

1. Take the Issue Apart

Topic: Energy sources

Scope: Whether or not nuclear power is a suitable replacement for other forms of energy

Conclusion: Nuclear power is not a solution to the problem of meeting ever-increasing energy needs

Evidence: Unnamed drawbacks

Assumptions:

Bullet Nuclear power has the potential to meet long-term energy needs.

Bullet Nuclear power is not our only energy option.

2. Select the Points You Will Make

Your job, as stated in the directions, is to decide whether or not you agree and explain your decision. Some would argue that the use of nuclear power is too dangerous, while others would say that we can’t afford not to use it. So which side do you take? (Remember that you need to take a position, but you aren’t limited to just one or two options as presented in the stimulus. For example, you don’t have to argue that nuclear power is too dangerous or that it is the solution to our energy needs. Your side could present a third, “in between” position.)

Remember, the essay isn’t about showing the admissions people what your deep-seated beliefs about the environment are—it’s about showing that you can formulate an argument and write it down. Quickly think through the pros and cons of each major point of view, and choose the side for which you have the most relevant and substantial support. For this topic, that process might go something like this:

Arguments for the use of nuclear power:

Bullet Inexpensive compared to other forms of energy

Bullet Fossil fuels will eventually be depleted

Bullet Solar power still too problematic and expensive

Arguments against the use of nuclear power:

Bullet Harmful to the environment

Bullet Dangerous to mankind

Bullet Safer alternatives already exist

Bullet Better alternatives may lie undiscovered

Again, it doesn’t really matter which side you take. Let’s say that in this case you decide to argue against nuclear power. Remember, the question is asking you to argue why the cons of nuclear power outweigh the pros—the inadequacy of this power source is the end you’re arguing toward, so don’t list it as a supporting argument.

3. Organize Your Argument

You’ve already begun to think out your arguments—that’s why you picked the side you did in the first place. Now’s the time to write them all out, including ones that weaken the opposing side. Here’s where you spell out your specific support for your thesis.

Nuclear power is not a viable alternative to other sources of energy because:

Bullet Radioactive, spent fuel has leaked from storage sites (too dangerous)

Bullet Reactor accidents can be catastrophic—Three Mile Island, Chernobyl (too dangerous)

Bullet More research into solar power will bring down its cost (weakens opposing argument)

Bullet Solar-powered homes and cars already exist (alternatives proven viable)

Bullet Renewable resources require money only for the materials needed to harvest them (alternatives are cheaper in the long run)

Bullet Energy companies don’t spend money on alternatives; no vested interest (better alternatives lie undiscovered)

4. Write Your Essay

Remember, open up with a general statement and then assert your position.

From there, get down your main points.

Sample Essay

Proponents of nuclear energy as “the power source for the future” have long touted its relative economy, “clean burning” technology, and virtually inexhaustible fuel supply. However, a close examination of the issue reveals that nuclear energy proves more problematic and dangerous than other forms of energy production and thus is not an acceptable solution to the problem of meeting ever-increasing energy needs.

First and foremost, nuclear power production presents the problem of radioactive waste storage. Fuel byproducts from nuclear fission remain toxic for thousands of years, and the spills and leaks from existing storage sites have been hazardous and costly to clean up. This remains true despite careful regulation and even under the best of circumstances. Even more appalling is the looming threat of accidents at the reactor itself: Incidents at the Three Mile Island and Chernobyl power plants and at other production sites have warned us that the consequences of a nuclear meltdown can be catastrophic and felt worldwide.

But beyond the enormous long-term environmental problems and short-term health risks, the bottom line issue for the production of energy is one of economics. Power production in our society is a business just like any other, and the large companies that produce this country’s electricity and gas claim they are unable to make alternatives such as solar power affordable.

Yet—largely due to incentives from the federal government—there already exist homes heated by solar power, and cars fueled by the sun. If the limited resources devoted to date to such energy alternatives have already produced working models, a more intensive, broadly based, and supported effort is likely to make those alternatives less expensive and problematic.

Besides the benefits in terms of both of cost and safety, renewable resources such as solar and hydroelectric power represent far better options in the long run for development: They require money only for the materials needed to harvest them. While sunlight and water 115 are free, the innovative technologies and industrial strategies devised to harness them have created a geometric progression of spin-offs affecting fields as diverse as agriculture, real estate, space exploration, and social policy. They have also repeatedly produced secondary economic and social benefits, such as the large recreational and irrigation reservoirs created in the American Southwest behind large hydroelectric dams like the Hoover and Grand Coullee.

While it may now be clear that the drawbacks to the use of nuclear power are too great, it should also be apparent that the long-term benefits of renewable resources would reward investment. If these alternatives are explored more seriously than they have been in the past, safer and less expensive sources of power will undoubtedly live up to their promise. With limited resources at our disposal and a burgeoning global population to consider, further investment in nuclear power would mark an unconscionable and unnecessary waste of time and money.

5. Proofread Your Work

Take that last couple of minutes to catch any glaring errors.

APPLYING THE KAPLAN FIVE-STEP METHOD TO THE ARGUMENT ESSAY

Let’s use the Kaplan Five-Step Method on an Argument topic:

The problem of poorly trained teachers that has plagued the state public school system is bound to become a good deal less serious in the future. The state has initiated comprehensive guidelines that oblige state teachers to complete a number of required credits in education and educational psychology at the graduate level before being certified.

Explain how logically persuasive you find this argument. In discussing your viewpoint, analyze the argument’s line of reasoning and its use of evidence. Also explain what, if anything, would make the argument more valid and convincing or help you to better evaluate its conclusion.

1. Take the argument apart.

First, identify the conclusion—the point the argument’s trying to make. Here, the conclusion is:

The problem of poorly trained teachers that has plagued the state public school system is bound to become a good deal less serious in the future.

Next, identify the evidence—the basis for the conclusion. Here, the evidence is:

The state has initiated comprehensive guidelines that oblige state teachers to complete a number of required credits in education and educational psychology at the graduate level before being certified.

Finally, sum up the argument in your own words:

The problem of badly trained teachers will become less serious because they’ll be getting better training.

Explain how logically persuasive you find this argument. In explaining your viewpoint, analyze the argument’s line of reasoning and its use of evidence. Also explain what, if anything, would make the argument more valid and convincing or would help you to better evaluate its conclusion.

Bullet Credits in education will improve teachers’ classroom performance.

Bullet Present bad teachers haven’t already met this standard of training.

Bullet Current poor teachers will not still be teaching in the future, or will have to be trained, too.

2. Select the points you will make.

Analyze the use of evidence in the argument.

Determine whether there’s anything relevant that’s not discussed.

Bullet Whether the training will actually address the cause of the problems

Bullet How to either improve or remove the poor teachers now teaching

Also determine what types of evidence would make the argument stronger or more logically sound. In this case, we need some new evidence supporting the assumptions.

Bullet Evidence verifying that this training will make better teachers

Bullet Evidence making it clear that present bad teachers haven’t already had this training

Bullet Evidence suggesting why all or many bad teachers won’t still be teaching in the future (or why they’ll be better trained)

3. Organize.

For an essay on this topic, your opening sentence might look like this:

The writer concludes that the present problem of poorly trained teachers will become less severe in the future because of required course work in education and psychology.

Then use your notes as a working outline. Remember to lead with your best arguments. You might also recommend new evidence you’d like to see and explain why.

The argument says that:

The problem of poorly trained teachers will become less serious with better training.

It assumes that:

Bullet Course work in education will improve teachers’ classroom performance.

Bullet Present bad teachers haven’t already met this standard of classroom training.

Bullet Current poor teachers will not be teaching in the future or will get training, too.

4. Write your essay.

Keep in mind the basic principles of writing and remember the following issues:

What assumptions are made by the author?

Bullet Are these assumptions valid? Why or why not?

Bullet What additional information or evidence would make the argument stronger?

Your essay might look something like this:

Sample Essay

The writer concludes that the present problem of poorly trained teachers will become less severe in the future because of required credits in education and psychology. However, the conclusion relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence.

First, the writer assumes that the required courses will make better teachers. In fact, the courses might be entirely irrelevant to the teachers’ failings. If, for example, the prevalent problem is cultural and linguistic gaps between teacher and student, graduate level courses that do not address these specific issues probably won’t do much good. The argument that the courses will improve teachers would be strengthened if the writer provided evidence that the training will be relevant to the problems.

In addition, the writer assumes that current poor teachers have not already had this training. In fact, the writer doesn’t mention whether or not some or all of the poor teachers have had similar training. The argument would be strengthened considerably if the writer provided evidence that current poor teachers have not had training comparable to the new requirements.

Finally, the writer assumes that poor teachers currently working will either stop teaching in the future or will have received training. The writer provides no evidence, though, to indicate that this is the case. As the argument stands, it’s highly possible that only brand-new teachers will receive the training, and the bright future to which the writer refers is decades away. Only if the writer provides evidence that all teachers in the system will receive training—and will then change their teaching methods accordingly—does the argument hold.

5. Proofread.

Save a few minutes to go back over your essay and catch any obvious errors.

PART FOUR: PREPARE YOUR TEMPLATES

On test day, you will be facing two writing assignments that you must complete quickly and effectively. You will be under pressure: little time is allotted for each task. Your best strategy is to do as much advance preparation as possible, and that means arming yourself with a pair of flexible and logically robust templates that will guide you in your analyses and assist you in formulating your essays.

Sample Template for an Issue Essay

Introduction

Objectives: Restate the issue; take a stand. Make your position clear in a strong thesis statement at the end of your first paragraph.

Body (3+ paragraphs)

Objective: In each paragraph, develop one of the reasons for your position. Provide concrete support for that reason using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes. Acknowledge and refute counterarguments.

Conclusion

Objective: Reaffirm your position and summarize main points of support.

Sample Template for an Argument Essay

Introduction

Objective: Rephrase the argument. Briefly identify its main flaws in the order in which you will discuss them.

1) Paraphrase the argument. If the stimulus includes an attribution of the argument, you should incorporate it into your opening paraphrase (e.g., “The Clairville TownshipPlanning Board proposes to [accomplish X] by [doing Y]. The Board supports this proposalby [such-and-such evidence or rationale]. “). If the stimulus is presented without such attribution, you can simply refer to it as “the given argument” or “the given proposal.”

2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument.

3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument or defects in the plan.

4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument or proposal.

Body (3+ paragraphs)

Objective: Explain in detail the weaknesses cited in your introductory paragraph. Use one paragraph per weakness (two if the weakness requires lengthy discussion).

Conclusion

Objectives: Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument or proposal.

PART FIVE: ISSUE AND ARGUMENT PRACTICE EXERCISES

Issue Task Exercises

Directions: The following is a series of prompts of the sort that you might encounter on the GRE or GMAT. Using the methods of logical analysis and organization you have learned in this chapter, practice planning an essay for each sample prompt. For each stimulus,

1. Read the stimulus.

2. Use the questions below the stimulus as a guide to approach organizing an answer. The questions guide you through one of the essay templates discussed earlier in this chapter.

3. Briefly list or draft out the paragraphs of an essay that takes a stand on the issue described by the stimulus in the spaces provided. Don’t worry about form, language or mechanics at this point: you just want to get the key ideas down.

A detailed discussion of each stimulus with sample answers is found at the end of the chapter. Although the exact content of answers will vary, the example of discussion and analysis will give you a good idea of whether or not you are on the right track in your own analysis.

1. “Many people believe that the people in their early environment (for example parents, family, teachers, friends) have caused them to think and behave in the way they do. Yet, in fact, it is primarily the nature of our innate and inherited personality characteristics that mainly define who we are as individuals.”

Describe the false dilemma and/or overstated generalization contained in the stimulus:

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1) Briefly paraphrase the point of the proposition as you believe it was intended to be understood:

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2) Point out words and phrases that are imprecise and mention the complexities they entail.

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3) For a false dilemma, suggest a range of potential alternatives to the extreme positions cited.

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4) Allude to and address the potential objections to your position.

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5) Argue in support of your position.

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2. “Science tends to contribute to the stability of society. Art tends to destabilize society. This complementary relationship embodies their value.”

Describe the false dilemma and/or overstated generalization contained in the stimulus:

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Paragraph 1: restate the issue, explain the complications, take a stand.

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Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: elaborate on your position using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

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Last Paragraph: Conclude your essay.

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3. “The ease of communication common in today’s electronic media environment promotes a habit of hasty, ill-conceived thinking instead of thoughtful, well-reasoned judgment.”

Describe the false dilemma and/or overstated generalization contained in the stimulus:

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Paragraph 1: Restate the Issue, explain the complications, take a stand and characterize (without elaborating) the arguments that you will present.

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Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Elaborate on your position, using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

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Paragraph next-to-last: Develop and then refute the alternative position.

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Final Paragraph: Conclude your essay.

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4. “Colleges should emphasize general intellectual development as the primary goal for students rather than focusing on career preparation.”

Describe the false dilemma and/or overstated generalization contained in the stimulus:

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Paragraph 1: Restate the Issue, explain the complications, take a stand and characterize (without elaborating) the arguments that you will present.

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Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Elaborate on your position, using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

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Paragraph next-to-last: Develop and then refute the alternative position.

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Final Paragraph: Conclude your essay.

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Argument Task Exercises

Directions: The following is a series of prompts of the sort that you might encounter on the GRE or GMAT. Using the methods of logical analysis and organization you have learned in this chapter, practice planning an essay for each sample prompt. For each stimulus,

1. Read the stimulus.

2. Analyze the argument and fill in the blanks provided for the conclusion and premises of each argument.

3. Use the questions below the stimulus as a guide to approach organizing an answer. The questions guide you through one of the essay templates discussed earlier in this chapter.

4. Briefly list or draft out the paragraphs of an essay that appropriately analyzes the argument described by the stimulus in the spaces provided. Don’t worry about form, language or mechanics at this point: you just want to get the key ideas down.

A detailed discussion of each stimulus with sample answers is found at the end of the chapter. Although the exact content of answers will vary, the example of discussion and analysis will give you a good idea of whether or not you are on the right track in your own analysis.

1. The following appeared in a memo from the general director of marketing for Never-Stick, Inc.

“A recent study of cooks who use the Never-Stick frying pan shows that our company is wasting the money it spends on its exclusive ‘Bondure’ process, which ensures that our non-stick coating will last for five years. NeverStick has made the Bondure process a centerpiece of its advertising for ten years, but the new study shows that the average Never-Stick owner replaces used frying pans every three or four years. Furthermore, Never-Stick owners surveyed in the Southwestern states, where many Never-Stick customers live, value the unique Cool-Grip handle and fashion enamel colors more than the durability of the Bondure coating. This study suggests that Never-Stick can boost profits by discontinuing the use of the Bondure process.”

What conclusion does this stimulus draw?

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List the premises in this stimulus that lead to its conclusion:

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List the fallacies that make the argument weak:

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument:

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2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument:

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3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument:

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4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument:

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Paragraph 2, 3, etc.

Explain in detail the weaknesses alluded to in your introduction:

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Final Paragraph

Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument:

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2. The following appeared as part of a memorandum issued by the managing editor of Deceus, a large publishing house.

“Our least-successful line of books over the past three years has been the Angelus line of romance thriller novels. The covers of books in the Angelus line feature the main characters depicted in an action pose. Over the same period, competing publishing houses have noticeably decreased their offerings in the genre of romance thrillers and have moved away from picturing main characters on book covers. Furthermore, the cost of advances and royalties to authors who write romance thrillers has been steadily increasing. Therefore, Deceus Publishing should eliminate the Angelus line of romance thriller novels.”

What conclusion does this stimulus draw?

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List the premises in this stimulus that lead to its conclusion:

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List the fallacies that make the argument weak:

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument:

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2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument:

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3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument:

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4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument:

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Paragraph 2, 3, etc.

Explain in detail the weaknesses alluded to in your introduction:

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Final Paragraph

Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument:

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3. The following recommendation was made in a letter from the board of trustees of Plum Island College, a private educational institution, and presented to the governing committee of the college.

“We recommend that Plum Island College remain at its traditional 150 year-old campus site off the coast of Baytown rather than moving to the site available on the mainland. True, the majority of the faculty members voted in favor of relocating the college, pointing out that the proposed site allows for greater expansion and growth. But a survey conducted by the Student Congress showed that seventy-five percent of the students who responded preferred that the school stay at its original site, and a majority of the alumni who responded to a second survey also opposed relocation. Keeping the college at its original location, therefore, will maintain student morale and preserve the financial support provided by alumni.”

What conclusion does this stimulus draw?

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List the premises in this stimulus that lead to its conclusion:

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List the fallacies that make the argument weak:

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument:

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2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument:

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3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument:

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4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument:

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Paragraph 2, 3, etc.

Explain in detail the weaknesses alluded to in your introduction:

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Final Paragraph

Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument:

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4. The following appeared in a letter addressed to the superintendent of schools for the Smalltown Independent School District

“All students should be required to take a course in advanced algebra at Smalltown High School. In the past three years,Western Community College has complained that first-year students entering from Smalltown High are very poorly prepared to deal with their required first-year college mathematics courses. Since a number of parents in the Smalltown area have pointed out that they are too busy to provide additional help for their children, alternative instruction is needed to ensure that these students are prepared with the skills they need. Although there is an after school tutoring center available in Smalltown, not all parents have the financial means necessary to afford to send their teenage children there. Therefore an effective and required advanced algebra course provided by Smalltown High School is the only solution to this dilemma.”

What conclusion does this stimulus draw?

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List the premises in this stimulus that lead to its conclusion:

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List the fallacies that make the argument weak:

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument:

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2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument:

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3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument:

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4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument:

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Paragraph 2, 3, etc.

Explain in detail the weaknesses alluded to in your introduction:

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Final Paragraph

Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument:

9781419552175_Interior_0151_008

ISSUE AND ARGUMENT ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS

Issue Tasks

1. This issue prompt is the old nature vs. nurture argument recast in slightly different words. By now you should be able to recognize this issue as a false dilemma. No one is a product exclusively of either their environment or of their genetics. The challenge of this prompt is to move systematically through the issue when you write your essay without getting bogged down or carried away in tangents. If you have some additional information that can be used as support, such as knowledge of studies of identical twins, that can help you in your argument. But even if you don’t have any background in the psychology of the issue, you can still argue from a logical standpoint that the prompt is an oversimplification of a complex situation, and that your own position is better.

1) Briefly paraphrase the point of the proposition as you believe it was intended to be understood.

“The contention that inherited factors, rather than environmental influences, are primarily responsible for the formation of the personality is an enticing argument…”

2) Point out the words and phrases that are imprecise, and mention the complexities they entail.

“Such a contention is more complex than it seems on the surface. For example, the position statement mentions ‘personality’ as though it were a well-defined and static phenomenon, when in fact it is difficult even for experts to define exactly what constitutes personality…”

3) For a false dilemma, suggest a range of potential alternatives to the extreme positions cited.

It may be more accurate to say, not that people inherit particular personality traits, but rather that people inherit a range of potentials for emotional traits. Environmental factors contribute to whether or not these potentials are expressed—or perhaps even if some of them are expressed at all. For example, genetically identical twins who are separated at birth …”

4) Allude to and address the potential objections to your position.

“Some may wish to object to my position by making the argument either that a person’s personality results completely from that person’s environment, or that personality results completely from inborn factors. Such arguments become suspect when viewed in light of a few simple examples. For instance, people obviously sometimes make rational decisions that go against the values of their upbringing. By the same token, people do apparently inherit some mental traits from their families. But the big picture is not that simple. The primary flaw of the argument that inheritance is more important than environment in shaping personality is that it oversimplifies a complex issue into an illusory false dilemma. I believe that a combination of nature and nurture goes into the personality makeup of each individual… ”

5) Argue in support of your position.

“For example, my sister and I couldn’t be less alike. Even though we are close in age and grew up in essentially the same environment, she is a world traveler and adventurer who always disliked school whereas I am … Yet we also share some similar traits with our parents, such as … These examples illustrate how environmental and inherited factors all contribute to a mix of elements that go into personality….

“Both the argument that my sister is very different from me because she must have inherited different traits and the argument that she is different because she was subject to a different environment are arguments that contain causal fallacies... The fact that both arguments can be made with roughly the same level of merit (i.e., very little) demonstrates that they are equally specious…”

2. This assertion takes two overstated generalizations (one about art and one about science) and combines them into a third overstated generalization (that the contrast is the source of their value).

As always, attack the generalizations by pointing out exceptions. In planning this essay, brainstorm a list of examples of cases where science destabilizes society and cases where art stabilizes. Then generate examples of cases where science and art have value independent of each other. Arrange these examples into a coherent position.

Paragraph 1: restate the issue, explain the complications, take a stand.

“Art and science both have their respective places in society, and both are important. To say, however, that science tends to make society more stable while art tends to make it less stable is an overstated generalization that doesn’t account for the complexities of those roles…I believe that, while art and science both contribute in important ways to society, those contributions are more rich and varied than the statements imply.

Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: elaborate on your position using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

“It’s often easier to think of examples of artistic works that destabilize society. For instance, the symphonies of Beethoven made people question the scope and emotional pitch of what a symphony should be … However, there are many cases in which artistic works actually contribute to the stability of society. An extreme example might be the propagandistic painting and sculpture of Stalinist era Russia, but a milder example is Rudyard Kipling’s stories, poems and novels, which were designed to perpetuate the status quo of Victorian Imperial England…”

“Also, while it is tempting to think of science as mainly a stabilizing force in society, in many cases science can be the source of destabilization. We think of helpful inventions such as penicillin, steam power and flight as things that contribute to stable society, but in fact these inventions cause great long-term upheavals … Furthermore, some of the advances of science, for example atomic weapons, can be a source of massive social change…”

“Finally, it is hard to say with absolute certainty how much the interaction between science and art influences the stability of society. There are even areas in which the two overlap so much as to become nearly indistinguishable…”

Last paragraph: conclude your essay

“Ultimately, the role of science and art in society is much more complex than an essay of this scope can encapsulate. But an examination of the examples outlined above does illuminate the intricacy of the issue…”

3. This essay prompt is built on a false dilemma: the contrast between the hasty, off-the-cuff thinking encouraged by electronic media (presumably such as the Internet, email and so forth) as opposed to the supposedly well-reasoned thinking habits of the past (presumably the paper-and-pencil or typewriter environment). Always attack a false dilemma by pointing out exceptions to its extremes. Simply because a document or idea is recorded in an electronic medium does not mean that it cannot be well-thought-out. By the same token, much of the writing done in the paper and typewriter era was just as hasty and ill-advised as anything ever put into an email.

While it is possible to write an essay that agrees with the assertion of this stimulus and supports its ideas with appropriate evidence, it is probably easier to defend the position that the idea in the stimulus is a false dilemma and instead support a position that a shift in the style and care of thinking has not automatically resulted from the change to electronic media.

Paragraph 1: Restate the Issue, explain the complications, take a stand and characterize (without elaborating) the arguments that you will present.

“If it is true that the medium in which an idea is recorded reflects something about the way that idea was generated, then the advent of the electronic age can arguably have been said to have had an impact on how thoughts are generated. The idea that speedier communication is a two-edged sword that allows people to bring thoughts to the public before they’ve had time for review and consideration is an interesting potential result of this change. But to assert categorically that electronic communication necessarily results in a sloppier style of thinking than other, less ephemeral forms of communication is, itself, not a very well-thought-out idea. In the broader scope, the question of the relationship between the medium and the amount of thinking behind an idea is more complex than that. In fact, the assertion sets up a false dilemma between two contrasting extremes that are not mutually exclusive…”

Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Elaborate on your position, using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

“One good example of an exception to the idea that communication in the pre-electronic era was more well-reasoned is the voluminous mail systems of the 19th century world. In the days before telephones, many educated people were prolific letter writers, as anyone who has ever had to search through the letters of a famous historical figure can attest. In London in the 19th century, mail was delivered 12 times a day, and telegrams were delivered continuously. One need only glance at a novel such as Bram Stoker’s Dracula to see that written communication in the pre-electronic era was often just as hasty and sloppy as the most hurried email of the 21st century…”

“Although the example of emails tends to make people think of the rapid communication involved in different kinds of instant messaging, work written on electronic devices and then published on paper or the Internet also constitutes electronic communication. There is no evidence to support the idea that work written on a word processor is any less well-developed in its thinking than work written on a piece of parchment with a quill pen. Indeed, because word processing allows authors and editors to change things more easily, it may actually contribute to more developed thoughts making it into the final version…”

Paragraph next-to-last: Develop and then refute the alternative position.

“Opponents of my position will point to the worst instances of verbal incontinency available in electronic media: self-indulgent blogs, off-the-cuff editorials, hurried commercial sites and documents published without reliable review. But these abuses of the forums of public communication are not new to the electronic media: examples of similar types of publications have been common at least since the invention of the printing press...”

Final Paragraph: Conclude your essay

“The examples outlined above show that the electronic medium is a tool, like the printing press or the pen, that doesn’t inherently reflect the depth and complexity of the thought behind it…

4. This essay prompt sets up a false dilemma between “intellectual development” (whatever that is) and career preparation as student goals emphasized by colleges. The more complex view is that it is possible for colleges to perform both functions at the same time, to a greater or lesser extent. Also, the assertion that “colleges should” is an overstated generalization. It is possible to imagine a lot of scenarios with different types of colleges and different student bodies that have different curricular needs. The term “colleges” itself is ill-defined here, as is “general intellectual development.”

Whichever side of the issue you come down on in writing your response to this prompt, it is important to remember that the readers are looking for how well you respond, not for a “correct” response. The example answers below include samples of arguments from both sides of the issue.

Paragraph 1: Restate the Issue, explain the complications, take a stand and characterize (without elaborating) the arguments that you will present.

“From their earliest days, institutions of higher education have always served a dual purpose: nurturing the intellectual development of the young and preparing them for future careers. From Plato’s academy preparing young men for their lives of aristocratic citizenship, to the mediaeval European universities training future clergymen, to the modern array of colleges and universities training aspiring doctors, lawyers and rocket scientists, most higher education institutions have sought to straddle the fence between training the person and the professional. While the situation is more complex than the either/or false dilemma of the topic would have one believe, I generally …”

Example of agreement

“… agree that colleges and other undergraduate institutions should focus primarily on intellectual development rather than career preparation. My stance on this issue is based on the idea that intellectual development creates mental flexibility and professional adaptability. These qualities are far more important in today’s changing marketplace than a fixed and limited curriculum of career preparation.”

Example of disagreement

“… disagree that colleges and other undergraduate institutions should focus primarily on intellectual development rather than career preparation. My stance on this issue is based on the idea that today’s marketplace is so competitive and the career skills needed—especially in particular fields—are so extensive that specialization and focus are more necessary than ever if students are to achieve their career goals. Many students are aware of this need, and will rightfully demand the career preparation that their institutions should be prepared to give.”

Example of middle-of-the-road position

“… feel that colleges should do their best to provide both intellectual development and career preparation together. The versatility and cultural literacy of a general intellectual education is a perfect compliment to the focused career skills required by students going into particular fields, and a blending of the two provides the best of both worlds without losing any of the important aspects of either.”

Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Elaborate on your position, using empirical evidence, expert testimony, or anecdotes.

(Agreement) “Overspecialization has proven to be the undoing of many laid-off workers in today’s job market. Witness the plunge in employment among high-tech workers last decade. Overnight, thousands of highly-trained Web designers, software engineers and computer experts found themselves displaced with no jobs available and inadequate training for an alternate career. How might they have been better off if they had undergone a general curriculum that prepared them for success in a variety of fields and careers…”

(Disagreement) “Gone are the days when a general education in arts and literature was adequate for anyone (usually any man) to acquire the career of his choice. In today’s world, corporate employers and post-graduate professional schools require an intensive range of specialized skills before they will even consider a candidate seriously. By not providing them with the necessary training, colleges are setting their students up for failure…” (Middle of the road) “The key idea underlying my position is the idea that general intellectual development is career preparation. The patterns and methods of critical thinking that are taught in a good general curriculum are the essential tools used to approach and understand the information relevant to preparation in a particular career. The old adage about giving a man a fish versus teaching a man to fish applies here as well. Career preparation gives students the tools they need to succeed in their chosen career, and general intellectual education gives students the tools they need to succeed in career preparation…”

Argument Tasks

1. Conclusion: Discontinuing the Bondure process will increase profits.

Premises:

Bullet Most customers replace their frying pans before they benefit from the special process.

Bullet A sample of customers valued other features of the product over the special process.

Discussion:

When you extract the premises and conclusion from this stimulus, the logical disconnect should become clear: the premises do not support the conclusion about higher profits. The premises do support the idea that discontinuing the Bondure process will not hurt sales. Customers are either not concerned with the process or are not using the benefits of it, so they are unlikely to make purchase decisions based on the presence or absence 145 of the bonding process. But that evidence does not necessarily translate into higher profits. In order to make a strong argument for the higher profits conclusion, the stimulus needs to extend the preliminary conclusion (that ceasing the process will not hurt sales) with additional evidence (for example, that it is cheaper to make frying pans without the Bondure process).

1) Paraphrase the argument:

“The marketing director of Never-Stick proposes to increase profits by ceasing use of the Bondure process…As evidence, the director cites the customer pattern of replacing frying pans every three years, thus depriving them of …Also, the director points to a recent study that shows …”

2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument:

For this prompt, one of the appealing things about its argument is that the evidence does support a conclusion: that sales will not be hurt by ceasing the process. There are other possibilities, but this one stands out:

“At first, this argument seems well-constructed. The study and the survey do certainly support the conclusion that sales will not decrease because of …”

3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument:

The main weakness is the logical leap from the conclusion that sales will not decrease to the increase in profits. Also there is a possible causal fallacy in premise one: just because people don’t use the whole five-year lifespan of the nonstick coating doesn’t mean that they don’t make buying decisions based on it being there. Finally, there is a hasty generalization embedded in the limited sample size of the survey mentioned in premise two.

“However, this argument is weakened by serious flaws. First of all, the conclusion does not follow logically from the premises. The argument that ceasing the process will not hurt sales does not necessarily lead to higher profits because … Secondly, the argument shows a possible causal fallacy in assuming that customers don’t buy frying pans on the basis of the special process … Finally, the cited study may be based on an inappropriate sample…”

4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument:

In this case, in order to make sure the conclusion follows from the premise, we need evidence that connects the Bondure process with the bottom line:

“The argument would have been more compelling if the director of marketing had direct evidence that an appropriate sampling of customers don’t purchase frying pans on the basis of the process … More importantly, though, the argument should show evidence that Never-Stick Inc. can lower costs by eliminating the process, and that those lower costs translate to higher profits…”

5) Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument:

Briefly go back over the main points that you’ve elaborated.

“Given the weaknesses inherent in this argument, it is not surprising that its conclusion is less than compelling. The argument might have been somewhat stronger if the marketing director had been able to show a relevant connection between … ”

2. Conclusion: Deceus publishing should eliminate the Angelus line.

Premises:

1) The Angelus line has not been selling as well as other Deceus lines of books.

2) The covers of Angelus books feature the main characters.

3) Other publishers have decreased their offerings in this genre and have not featured main characters on the book covers.

4) The cost of producing Angelus books has gone up.

Discussion:

Again, as with all Analytical Writing prompts, the argument here is invalid—the premises do not lead logically to the conclusion. Premise one contains a fallacy of exclusion: we know from the stimulus that Angelus is the “least-successful” book line at the company, but we don’t know whether or not that means it is unprofitable. Premise four has a similar problem, still failing to connect the rising costs with any mention of profit. Premise two and three set up a false analogy, comparing Deceus to other companies about which we know nothing at all.

In order to be strengthened, this argument needs development along two major lines. First, it needs some evidence one way or another about whether or not the Angelus line is making a profit. Then it needs evidence to connect the analogous situation of other companies to the situation of Deceus.

Sample Outline:

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument:

“…that the lack of success of the Angelus line and the actions of other publishers mean that Deceus should discontinue …”

2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument

“…it may seem reasonable, at first glance, that a company should withdraw its faltering products from the market. But that is not, in fact, the conclusion supported by the evidence presented here…”

3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument or defects in the plan

“ … fails to connect the lack of success of the Angelus line with any mention of profitability. Furthermore, the information on book covers and the withdrawal of similar books by other publishers is not related by any clear evidence to the situation at Deceus…”

4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument or proposal

“ …argument would be strengthened by a clear connection between the Angelus line and evidence about its present and future profitability …”

Paragraphs 2, 3, 4 …

Explain the argument’s weaknesses in detail

“First of all, the proposal tells us that Angelus is the company’s ‘least-successful’ line of products. ‘Least-successful’ is a relative term that is not related to the question of whether or not the line makes a profit. Deceus’s ‘Least-successful’ product may be immensely successful compared with the products of other companies, for all we know…”

“In a related vein, the proposal makes no mention of the impact of the rising costs of the Angelus line on the profitability of the product…”

“The information on the actions of other companies sets up a false analogy…this information is only pertinent to the argument if there is further information that the other companies, who are discontinuing their romance thriller lines, have some connection with the situation of Deceus. If we know, for example, that there is evidence to indicate a loss of consumer interest in the genre of romance thrillers … even then, it may be that the actions of other companies in discontinuing their romance thrillers will give a boost to the Angelus line by reducing supply in a market where demand is constant…”

“Finally, the point about the book cover is largely irrelevant. In the absence of clear evidence of a connection between consumer buying decisions and the design of book covers, the information has no bearing on the argument. The proposal may be attempting to use the similarity as part of the premise supporting the false analogy above, but a similarity in book jacket designs is hardly evidence of an analogous situation…”

Final Paragraph

Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument

“In sum, the weaknesses inherent in the logic of this proposal make it less convincing than it could be…”

3. Conclusion: Plum Island College should remain at its original site rather than moving to the mainland.

Preliminary conclusion:

Keeping the college where it is will maintain student morale and keep alumni donating.

Premises:

A survey showed that most students prefer that the college remain where it is.

Another survey showed that alumni prefer that the college stay off the mainland.

Discussion:

This argument has a series of major flaws. First, its two major pieces of evidence, the student survey and the alumni survey, are used to support a preliminary conclusion in what may be a hasty generalization: we have no way of knowing if the survey sample is appropriate to support the idea that students and alumni might actually withdraw support if the college moved. Second, even if the preliminary conclusion is true, what about that faculty survey? The proposal merely asserts that the views of students and alumni are more important than the views of faculty without offering any evidence why this is so. Finally, the stimulus does not deal effectively with the counter-argument that the move would be a benefit for growth and expansion of the college. Also—and this is a small thing but worth mentioning—the description of the original college site as “traditional” constitutes an improper appeal to authority. Just because something is old or traditional doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the best thing.

This argument would be strengthened by direct evidence that student morale and a drop in alumni support would constitute a real threat to the existence of the college. Then, the argument needs an effective counter for the faculty survey and the possible need for expansion space that the original site does not have.

Paragraph 1

1) Paraphrase the argument that the college should remain where it is in order to maintain student morale and alumni support.

“…the trustees argue that the college should remain at its current site based on the views expressed in two surveys …”

2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument

“The morale of students and the support of alumni are definitely two important factors in the prosperity of a private college, and on that basis this argument has a certain appeal.”

3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument or defects in the plan

“Using the results of these two surveys, which are potentially problematic to begin with, as the only criterion for deciding the future location of the college shows itself under close examination to be less-than-convincing.”

4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument or proposal

“If there were some evidence that the views expressed by the faculty about the need for expansion space are invalid, along with a direct indication that student morale and alumni support are vital for the continuation of the college… However, as the argument stands, it is weak.”

Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Explain the argument’s weaknesses in detail

“To begin with, the surveys mentioned in the trustees’ letter are problematic. The letter gives us no evidence that the size and selection of the samples was appropriate to the issue being surveyed, creating the possibility of a hasty generalization… The fact that the views expressed in the student and alumni survey are so divergent from the views expressed in the faculty survey is, in itself, an inconsistency that suggests some inadequacy in the methodology.”

“Beyond the design of the surveys, the trustees’ use of the survey results as premises to support their conclusion is unwarranted. The letter summarizes the results of three surveys, then disregards the evidence suggested by the faculty survey without comment and jumps to the conclusion that the student and alumni views are more important. There is no effective counter-argument against the view that the school may need expansion room…”

“Finally, and this may seem like a small point, but worth mentioning, the characterization of the school’s current site as ‘traditional’ constitutes an improper appeal to authority…”

Final Paragraph: Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument

“In spite of these weaknesses in the areas of survey design, application of survey evidence and fallacious arguments, the trustees’ proposal can be made stronger by the inclusion of additional evidence. If there were some reliable indication that student morale and alumni support are vital to the continuation … If there were information on the validity of the survey design… If the letter contained a counter-argument that clearly showed the faculty concerns about the need for expansion were unfounded, and that no serious negative consequences would result from overriding the views of the faculty… And, finally, if the word ‘traditional’ were removed from the first sentence…”

4. Conclusion: A required advanced algebra course for every student is the only solution to the problem of students’ lack of preparedness for freshman math at Western CC.

Premises:

The college has complained that Smalltown High students are not prepared. Smalltown parents are too busy to help their kids learn more math. Not all parents can afford tutoring.

Discussion:

There are really two parts to the conclusion here, both flawed in slightly different ways. One part of the conclusion is that the advanced algebra course should be mandatory for all students. The second part is that the only solution is a course taught by the school, not provided by other means. In your essay, you can criticize both these parts of the argument.

The problem with insisting that the course be mandatory for all students is that not all students will be going to Western Community College—or even intending to go to college at all—so many of them will not need an advanced algebra course. The problem with insisting that only the school can provide such a course is that it sets up a false dilemma. Parent tutoring, use of the tutoring center, and the high school are not the only choices available for students to get the preparation they need.

Finally, the letter also makes an unfounded assumption when it jumps from the problem of the students’ lack of math knowledge to the solution of a high school course. A school course is not a magic bullet for solving a problem with deficiencies in students’ math knowledge.

Paragraph 1:

1) Paraphrase the argument

“…the author of this letter argues that the complaints of a local college constitute grounds for the institution of a mandatory advanced algebra course for all students at Smalltown High.”

2) Acknowledge the appeal of the argument

“While advanced algebra may be desirable and useful, and it is important for local educational institutions to collaborate on curriculum, the evidence presented hardly warrants the implementation of a mandatory course.“

3) Catalog the weaknesses of the argument or defects in the plan

“…feedback from a single community college cannot be taken as representative of the level of preparedness of all students. More important, though, are the two major flawed lines of argument in this letter: (1) that the course should be mandatory for all students and (2) that the high school is the only possible means of providing the course.”

4) Allude to other evidence that might have been introduced to strengthen the argument or proposal

“If there were some evidence that the complaints of Western Community College are more general, or other information about how these complaints are symptomatic of a larger need, that would strengthen the argument for making the course mandatory. Furthermore, if the letter specified further evidence about why the high school is the best forum for providing …”

Paragraphs 2, 3, etc.: Explain the argument’s weaknesses in detail

“The connecting of the criticism from Western Community College with the need for a course for all students is unfounded. Presumably many of the students at Smalltown high will not attend this particular college—or may not attend college at all—and therefore won’t need this advanced algebra course.”

“Furthermore, the letter’s insistence that the course be taught by the high school creates a false dilemma. The parents, the local tutoring center, and the school are not the only possibilities for providing the needed education to Smalltown students. For example, Western Community College itself might be interested in offering high school enrichment courses or remedial courses for entering fresh-men…”

“Finally, although it would be nice to believe that a course in the high school would solve the problem of students not knowing advanced algebra, in fact this is an unwarranted assumption. If students have undergone twelve years of schooling without—as Western Community College claims—acquiring the math skills they need for freshman math classes, how will yet another course help? The letter offers no evidence for why a course at the high school is a solution at all...”

Final Paragraph: Summarize the weaknesses and suggest ways to strengthen the argument

“In the form presented by this letter, the argument for a mandatory advanced algebra course at the high school has little merit… Evidence that the deficiencies seen by Western CC represent a more general lack of preparedness in math for all students, along with evidence that such courses had been successful in the past or at other schools, would tend to support the argument for the merits of the course…”

PRACTICE ANSWERS AND EXPLANATIONS

Practice 1

Paragraph 1

(1) The advice given to the company managers that hiring additional workers will result in a larger number of houses being built contains a fallacy of exclusion. (2) Several pieces of vital information are not taken into considerationin the reasoning that more workers means morehouses built, and a moment’s thought reveals that manyfactors other than merely the number of workersdeterminesthe answer to the question of how many houses willbe built. (3) For example, if the construction companydoesn’t have enough construction equipment or tools toequip more workers, then extra workers won’t help regardless.(4) If there aren’t enough building sites available,enough raw materials, or sufficient infrastructure to supportadditional workers, then hiring more workers mightwell be just a waste of money. (5) The whole question ofdiminishing returns in increasing staff size is not considered by this line of reasoning at all.

(1) Advice is the noun; advise is a verb.

More additional is an example of pleonasm (redundancy).

Advice is the singular subject of the sentence, so it takes the singular verb form, contains.

(2) Extremely vital is redundant.

This sentence is a run-on—two independent clauses joined by a comma with no conjunction. Fix it by either adding a conjunction or by making it into two sentences (or possibly by swapping the comma for a semicolon).

Moment’s is possessive here, so takes an apostrophe.

Reasoning is repetitive with the preceding clause, so swap it out for another term such as thought.

The sentence compares the number of workers with the other factors, so the comparative than is required.

The final question is embedded, so it takes a period rather than a question mark.

(3) Omit the slash as a substitute for the conjunction or in essays.

Workers is a simple plural here, so no apostrophe is necessary.

Always use regardless rather than irregardless.

(4) The sentence here refers to building locations (sites), not things seen (sights).

The middle term in this series violates parallelism in the original, creating confusion.

The future conditional subjunctive here takes the verb be rather than been.

(5) The phrase in increasing staff size modifies the question of diminishing returns, so put the modifier next to the thing it modifies in order to avoid confusion.

Paragraph 2

(1) While the school board’s argument that eating breakfast in the school breakfast program is related to a reduction of absenteeism may be convincing, (2) the conclusion that forcing more students to eat breakfast on the school program will cause a decrease in absences is unwarranted. (3) The statistics show a correspondence that is far from clear enough to assume causation. (4) The attendance of students at the school-sponsored breakfast program and at subsequent classes might both result from a third, unexamined cause that creates the observed effect. (5) For example, students who eat school breakfasts every day might just happen to be the ones who go to bed early [no comma] and therefore are up in time for both the breakfast and for classes. (6) Or perhaps the students with better attendance experience a different kind of parent supervision that contributes to both their better diet and their improved attendance.

(1) School board is a common noun, so no capitals. If it were the name of a specific school board, for example the Shelby County School Board, then it would be capitalized.

In the school breakfast program modifies eating breakfast, so it should go closer to what it modifies in order to avoid confusion about what exactly is in the program.

This sentence is a fragment because of the subordinate while at the beginning. One easy way to fix this problem is to join it to the next sentence by changing the period to a comma and eliminating the capital letter at the beginning of the next sentence as shown.

(2) Decreasing drop is redundant.

(3) Statistics is a simple plural, not a possessive, so no apostrophe is needed.

Correspondence is misspelled.

(4) Maybe is a lowbrow qualifier; prefer might or perhaps.

Effect is the noun that describes an influence or outcome. The noun affect is psychological jargon for “emotion.”

(5) The word everyday means “ordinary.” The phrase every day means “happening on each day.”

The phrase that follows the conjunction and is not an independent clause (it shares its subject with the clause before the conjunction) so the comma is omitted in this case.

(6) Maybe is a lowbrow qualifier; prefer might or perhaps.

Keep the perspective consistent, and try to avoid the use of one as a pronoun.

Paragraph 3

(1) In surveying their customers and finding that most prefer games with lifelike graphics, the computer game company has correctly identified a cause for an increase in the popularity of particular game types. (2) From the evidence presented, it seems reasonable that certain customers buy the more lifelike games in preference to games with inferior graphics. (3) However, the conclusion that game sales will rise as a result of this action neglects to take into account the evidence (4) that the more lifelike games require the latest computer hardware. (5) The argument presents no evidence that the target audience is undergoing a transition to this more advanced, and more expensive, type of computer platform. (6) On the contrary, common sense seems to suggest that, since the target audience tends to be young, that their earning power would not allow them to acquire the equipment necessary to accommodate the games in question, and thus the change in emphasis would not necessarily result in increased sales of those games. (7) If the company were to invest in development of these games, it might waste money in the end.

(1) The company has been surveying and finding. Changing the verb form to found in the original version violates parallelism and creates confusion.

It’s not clear in the original version who they refers to: it could be the customers or the company. Changing the pronoun clarifies that it is the customers who prefer lifelike games.

(2) Okay is a lowbrow modifier; reasonable is more appropriate.

The comma after the introductory clause From the evidence presented is technically optional, but probably helps prevent possible confusion in this case.

Might maybe is too tentative.

Worse is too lowbrow to be consistent with the tone of the rest of the paragraph; prefer inferior.

(3) End result is redundant.

(4) This sentence is a fragment. One easy way to fix the problem is to join this sentence to the previous one. Since it is a restrictive clause (beginning with that) it doesn’t

need a comma or conjunction—just remove the period and the initial capital letter.

New and latest together are redundant.

(5) Omit the wordy filler phrase to show the fact that

And more expensive is a parenthetic phrase, so it should be set off by commas.

(6) Add a comma after the introductory phrase On the contrary.

Omit the qualifier perhaps in this case because, in combination with the verb suggests, it comes across as overly tentative.

Accommodate is misspelled in the original.

The referent of the pronoun it is unclear in the original version. Specify what it is with a specific phrase such as the change in emphasis as shown.

(7) The subjunctive conditional in this sentence takes the were form of the verb.

Development is misspelled in the original.

Practice 2

1. Competition and cooperation are not mutually exclusive: think of team sports or corporate business ventures.

2. Educational systems have many goals; instilling values and providing job training are both important. Other goals include recreation, fitness training, and public service.

3. Government spending is more complicated than a choice between the arts and social services: a way can be found to afford both. Or, what about arts institutions such as museums, artists’ colonies and grant programs that provide social services (employment, daycare, support) and advance the arts at the same time?

4. It might show good work ethics to quit a job that you’re not enthusiastic about, but it is a false dilemma. Other alternatives include staying at your job but not working hard, or working hard and then quitting anyway.

5. Alternatives to this false dilemma include the possibility that some supporters of the bill understood it and thought that it would be good for America anyway, or that they didn’t understand it but weren’t thinking about the good of America at all—among others.

6. Or maybe the chess champion will win and feel great anyway, or he’ll lose and be impressed, pleased or relieved.

Practice 3

1. Any of the many cases where the rights of individuals come into conflict with each other is a good exception to this generalization. For example, a restaurant owner’s right to try and make a profit doesn’t supersede his/her customer’s right to healthy food: that’s why we have health department regulations.

2. There are many factors that contribute to commercial success: efficiency and quality are obviously important, for instance. Originality may be useful, but imitation can certainly be profitable.

3. There are many “vital” qualities for a leader. For example the ability to get other people to follow must be just as important as the ability to make decisions.

4. This generalization suggests that the only way to understand the difficulties that face public school teachers is to be one. That’s not necessarily true: the difficulties can be understood by observation or study, or a person could be a teacher and still not think that it was difficult.

5. The generalization here lies in connecting “practical research” (whatever that is) with enjoyable life. A lot of technologies that make life more enjoyable—for example the Graphite materials used in different kinds of sporting equipment—comes from general or abstract research.

6. This statement contains a false dilemma (style and substance are not mutually exclusive) but it also contains an overstated generalization in the assertion that “everyone thinks” style is more important. Any example of a person or group that values substance over style is a good example for attacking this generalization.

Practice 4

Conclusion: Brockhoff should become the athletic director of the district.

Premises:

Bullet Mr. Brockhoff began as the head coach five years ago.

Bullet In the last five years, the team has won three championships.

Bullet In the last five years, the quality of athletic facilities has improved.

Bullet As with all inductive arguments, the conclusion here is invalid. The premises show that Mr. Brockhoff’s tenure coincides with an improvement in the athletics program of the school, so you can infer a relationship. But there’s not necessarily a relationship: it might just be a coincidence, or there may be a confusion between causes and effects here. For example, an improvement in the athletic equipment may have caused the championships without any contribution from the coach. Furthermore, there’s no evidence to suggest that Mr. Brockhoff’s ability as a football coach necessarily makes him a good general director. It’s impossible to know whether the conclusion is true or not, but it isn’t necessarily false either.

Practice 5

In this stimulus, the conclusion implicitly bears on all people of all ages. Yet the study group is extremely limited. Any of the distinguishing characteristics of the sample group (that the subjects were women, that they were Belgian, that they were over eighty years old, that they lived in assisted care, and that they exercised) could have introduced factors that do not apply to the population as a whole.

Practice 6

In this instance, the differences in size and location between the two restaurants invalidate any inference you could make about the impact of table service on their relative popularity.

Practice 7

In this example, the drop in physical fitness is attributed to the economic recession on the grounds that expenditures on fitness-related products and services have dropped recently. Common sense should tell us that, at the national level, physical fitness is not determined by the amount spent on fitness products and services: in the best of times, the proportion of Saludians who even try to stay fit through such devices would probably not be enough to impact 25% of the population, and of those who tried, even fewer would have seen significant results. It is much more likely that the correlation is coincidental than causal.